Be kind, not nice

Don’t bother being nice, being nice is overrated. If you’re nice, you get walked all over. If you’re nice, you get taken advantage of.

Marriam-Webster defines “nice” as:

Nice (adjective): giving pleasure or joy; good and enjoyable; attractive or of good quality; kind, polite, and friendly

Being told to be nice to people is probably the worst advice you have ever been told. You know that saying “nice guys finish last”?  Wanna know why they finish last? Because no one wants to be friends with someone that’s nice. Being nice is something we try and force ourselves to do, in hopes that people will like us.

I could do nice, but it’s just not as much fun. Being nice isn’t my biggest goal in life. I’m trying to be honest about who I am, and that’s not always nice.
― Sharon Stone

When we are nice, we sometimes forget about our own happiness, and only concern ourselves with the happiness of others.  When I think of a “nice” person, I think of someone who’s polite, well-mannered and not one to hurt my feelings, but is that really a good quality to have? I don’t think so.

A nice person is superficial, and sometimes, just downright annoying. They spend all their time worrying about what other people think of them and finding ways to make sure people like them. Nice people are the ones that are doing the most harm, they hide behind a mask and are scared to offend others because of their constant need for external validation. When we are nice to people, we lose our sense of selves; we give up our integrity and our beliefs in the pursuit of receiving validation from others.

Sp instead of being nice, opt to be kind.

A kind person will tell you the the difficult truths, even when you don’t want to hear it.
A kind person will not worry about hurting your feelings when they tell you something because they want what’s best for you.
A kind person is generous with their love and they are the ones that people will turn to when they need help.

Finding someone who is not just nice, but also kind, is sometimes difficult as kindness often presents itself through niceness. Being kind allows us to be our true selves in the pursuit of the betterment of society. If that means that you come off as harsh or inconsiderate of their feelings sometimes, then so be it – as long as you are doing it out of kindness for the other person.

Everyone is fighting their own tough battles, and sometimes hearing the hard truth is more helpful than receiving nice, insignificant sentiments.


“The end result of kindness is that it draws people to you.”
― Anita Roddick


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